Something has motivated me into putting the third finger of my right hand and the digital finger of the left into action. Perhaps it is the Tory Party Conference that resurrected the two aforementioned fingers this time on the same hand and restored the blood flow.
I am in reflective mode on a Cricket season now complete with fixtures rained off, toured out or unfulfilled all replaced by the splendid, should be mentioned in dispatches John Harley system. Not that I am personally in need but have you thought of using your system as a dating replacement scheme, John?
'I have been seriously let down by a lady from Northfleet for this coming weekend. There is a table for two booked in Istead Rise for Saturday, but could arrange for home cooking if preferred. Have a strong sociable personality but this can easily be reduced through medium to weak for the right sort of person. A ball will be had if we hit it off and I would be prepared to become a regular fixture if you don't mind me playing away from home every now and then.'
I missed our final game of the season at Ash CC as I was visiting the Beautiful City of Venice (Pictured) looking for a venue for a possible cricket tour. With my two fingered approach to 'We're all in this together except we'll make sure you are deeper in it than us' I am happy to share how you can experience this timeless city for arachidi, getting away at night in time to be able to buy your frizzante rather than spumante vino rosso for €1.75 a litre before closing time.
Unless you want to be a former fixture secretary don't 'play chicken with the vaporettos', as suggested in 'You can keep your Gondolas' (The Sunday Times Travel October7). Instead cock a snoop at the sardine packed boats on the Grand Canal by using the Vaporetto dell Arte which for an additional €10 on your 72 hour+ travel pass you get your own private trip up and down and on and off as many times as you want, without the dangers of being mown down by the battery of boats much higher in the pecking order but lower in the puking order than the paltry canoe.
Unlike the chicken crossing the M25, for €2 you can get casseroled across the Grand Canal in a gondola from Salute( can't do an e acute) to San Marco and only have to put up with two grumpy gondoliers for four minutes.
I could tell you where to stay for £50 pp for 7 nights, with a thirty minute cruise into Venice, via Murano and Burano if you wish, all included in your water travel pass, with a Pizza place just round the corner, the Adriatic 5 mins walk for swimming, fishing, cockling and every beach activity or inactivity you can think of, six outdoor swimming pools, two heated and a crazy golf course to die for, but that would need some interest on your part.
To register this interest simply click on the adverts accompanying this blog (They will be more aimed at your needs than mine with these all pervading cookies) and that will allow me the €9.70 to save up for one of those solar powered swinging gondolas that the lovely lady wife would not let me buy this year.
So that's you and me both then for next year. Marina di Venezia is the venue, just a 15 minute cycle ride with a view to Punta Sabbioni where your water bound adventures begin. Book via The Sun Holidays saving the tokens, keeping those fingers crossed of course. The accommodation will cost you £200 for 7 nights for 4 people in a static caravan with a terrace.
By keeping each other informed using the John Harley system there ought to be enough people holidaying at the same time for beach cricket and enough booked caravans to ring fence a late night post match festa. On top of all that Venice is just around the corner with the top dog being The Doges Palace which is the dog's bollocks as far as potential for out of season indoor nets are concerned.
You're welcome.
Best wishes
Mike Kelleher
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